written Aug. 17, 2021

 I apologize for not writing more often.  The last couple of months have been hectic and stressful, but this past week (Aug. 12-17) was almost too much.

Let me go back a bit and explain.  In April we were given a trial date in regards to our children for August 17. Yes, that was today.  My husband and I would be present, and we were told it would probably be an all day thing.  At first, I prayed that God would move the date further out, but as August 17th approached, I began praying that God would give me the strength to get through the trial.

This past week was hard as I was anxious and nervous. I kept turning everything over to the Lord as I couldn't do anything to change the looming trial.  It was in God's hands.  Then August 12th happened.

I went to work that morning at 4 a.m. like any normal day.  I finished my shift and went back to my cell to get ready for a 10 a.m. appointment at Clothing Issue. As I was returning from my appointment, an officer approached me and asked my name. He had been looking for me, and he escorted me back to a caseworker's office.  The caseworker asked me if I had written to so-and-so. I said, "No ma'am. I don't know who that is." She said, "So that's how you want to play this," and immediately asked the officer to take me to One House.

Now One House is Administration/Segregation or as we like to call it, "the hole". The officer handcuffed me and walked me first to medical (where I found out I have lost some weight!) and then on to the hole. I was locked in a cell with a young woman who would be released from prison on Saturday morning.

I soon found out that someone (probably one of my two roommates) had written a postcard with racial slurs and threats to the person's life and had signed it with my name and my return address. Now this is not unusual as women here do this all the time to get someone in trouble. This was the first time someone had done it to me. So now I was sitting in the hole under investigation with no possibility of calling anyone.

I was an emotional wreck for the next two days. Who hated me so much that they would do this? I could even lose my release date as these were serious threats against someone. As I read my Bible crying, God led me to this passage: 

 "LORD, how are they increased that trouble me! many are they that rise up against me. Many there be which say of my soul, There is no help for him in God. Selah. But thou, O LORD, art a shield for me; my glory, and the lifter up of mine head.  I cried unto the LORD with my voice, and he heard me out of his holy hill. Selah. I laid me down and slept; I awaked; for the LORD sustained me. I will not be afraid of ten thousands of people, that have set themselves against me round about. Arise, O LORD; save me, O my God: for thou hast smitten all mine enemies upon the cheek bone; thou hast broken the teeth of the ungodly. Salvation belongeth unto the LORD: thy blessing is upon thy people. Selah       Psalm 3

My roommate left early Saturday morning so now I was in a cell by myself. As Monday approached I continued to pray that God would sustain me through the upcoming trial on Tuesday. Monday arrived, and I was still waiting for my county to pick me up. Around 10 a.m., I got a new roommate. It was my friend, Stephanie, who I met over two years ago when I was first incarcerated. She was in tears because she had requested protective custody because her roommate was threatening her.  She said, "Joy, God knew that I needed you for a roommate." I just smiled and agreed.  I could see God's hand all over this!

Well Tuesday morning arrived; the day of the trial, and I was still in prison. Talk about being puzzled. How could we have this trial if I'm not present? About 8:30 a.m. (the trial was to begin at 9:00 a.m.) the caseworker stopped by my door and said she had some legal mail for me. I was anxious to see what it was just in case it had some answers in it for me.

The first paper I read said, "Motion to cancel Habeus Corpus Ad Testificandum for the production of the body of Joy Carns." (You could add "dead or alive" for special effect😀) That didn't make much sense, so I read the next page. "In support of the Motion of Juvenile Officer States that the trial that was scheduled for August 17,2021, has been continued to December 13, 2021." 

I was speechless! God moved folks; I don't know how or why, but He did! Praise the Lord! This verse came to mind immediately:

"For the LORD is good; his mercy is everlasting; and his truth endureth to all generations."  Psalm 100:5

This week was full of ups and downs; emotional lows and emotional highs, but through it all God's been good. Through it all I could trust the Lord to direct my paths.


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